Tamariki in the Kitchen: Everyday Ways to Build Skills, Connection, and Fun
There’s something special about seeing little hands stirring, chopping, or sprinkling cheese on top of a homemade pizza. Sure, it can take a little longer and create a bit more chaos, but cooking alongside our tamariki is about much more than just getting dinner on the table. It’s about connection, confidence, and setting them up with skills that will serve them for life.
When we invite tamariki into the kitchen, we’re showing them that food isn’t just fuel, it’s about whānau, creativity, and creating kai for those we love (ourselves included). Here’s why it’s worth letting them roll up their sleeves (and maybe spill a little flour).
Why cooking together matters
It builds a positive relationship with food: Kids who help prepare meals are more likely to try new foods - especially if they’ve had a hand in choosing, chopping, or mixing them. Cooking together encourages curiosity and helps tamariki see food as something to explore, not just something they have to eat.
- It teaches life skills and independence: From measuring to mixing, following recipes to learning what goes into a balanced meal - these are skills that set tamariki up for independence later in life. It’s also a great way to weave in early lessons about nutrition and making healthy choices without it feeling like a bore.
- It boosts confidence and problem-solving: There’s pride in creating something from scratch - whether it’s a batch of muffins or a simple salad. Cooking builds patience and persistence, and when something doesn’t turn out quite right (too much salt, not enough rise), it’s an opportunity to problem-solve and reflect on what we might do differently next time.
- It’s an opportunity for connection: Cooking alongside your tamariki slows things down. It creates moments to talk, laugh, and connect. These shared experiences, even the messy ones, build warmth and belonging in ways that last far beyond the meal.
- An opportunity for creativity and fun: Recipes are a great foundation, but the real joy comes when tamariki experiment, adding their own twist to a dish or decorating in ways that make them proud. Cooking gives them a chance to express themselves and see their ideas come to life.
Getting started: age-appropriate ways to help
Toddlers (3–5 years)
This age is all about sensory exploration. Toddlers can:
- Wash fruit and vegetables
- Tear lettuce or herbs
- Stir ingredients in a bowl
- Use cookie cutters or add toppings
- Help set the table
School-aged tamariki (6–12 years)
As fine motor skills and reading abilities grow, so can their responsibilities. Kids in this age range can:
- Measure ingredients
- Read simple recipes with support
- Peel or cut soft foods with child-safe equipment
- Crack eggs and stir mixtures
- Help plan meals or pack lunches
Give them small leadership moments and celebrate their contributions.
“Can you be in charge of the salad tonight?”
Teens (13 years and up)
By the time they’re teenagers, tamariki can handle more independence in the kitchen. They can:
- Cook simple meals from start to finish
- Experiment with flavours and presentation
- Budget for ingredients and help with the shopping
- Take the lead on family favourites
Cooking can also be a calming, grounding activity for teens - something that builds confidence and provides a sense of achievement outside school or social pressures.
Beyond cooking: more ways to get them involved
- Involve your tamariki in choosing recipes or picking a theme night (e.g Taco Tuesday or a Make-Your-Own-Pizza night) and then planning what you’ll need.
- Get them helping with setting the table.
- Delegate jobs like serving, pouring drinks, or cleaning up - everyone contributes to the mealtime experience.
The lifelong benefits
Research shows that children who cook regularly with their whānau tend to make healthier food choices, have greater self-esteem, and are more likely to carry positive eating habits into adulthood. Understanding nutrition and the effort that goes into preparing food can also support their emotional wellbeing - helping them feel grounded and capable.
But perhaps most importantly, when we cook together, we’re creating something more than meals. We’re creating memories, the smell of muffins baking, the laughter after spilling flour, the shared pride of tasting something delicious you made together.
So tonight when you’re making dinner, invite your tamariki to join you. It might take a little longer, but the lessons, laughter, and connection will last far beyond the meal.