9 Tips for Cutting Back on Screen Time for Young Children

Recently, our whānau has cut back on screen time. It was hard! Probably the hardest thing I've ever done, harder than giving birth or running a marathon. LOL! But don't let that put you off, the rewards are worth it. Here are some things that I found helpful when cutting down.

1. Change your passwords and hide the remotes 

We changed the passwords on our phones, 'lost' the iPad at Nanny and Poppy's house, and started keeping the remotes on a high shelf.  

2. Talk to the older children about what the new screen time limits will be

We decided to stick to the Ministry of Health's guidelines of 2 hours for our primary school aged child, and 1 hour for our pre-schooler (none for the baby).

3. Cut back on your own screen time 

As adults, we had to acknowledge that we were on our phones way too much, and we were setting a bad example for our children. Our children absolutely would not be happy to not go on a screen if they saw that we were on ours. I decided that I would cut my recreational screen time to two hours. We stopped watching breakfast TV.

Tip- If you're cutting back on screens you'll need to fill the time with something else. Try to think back to when you were at school and what activities you liked doing. If it was sport, maybe join a team, start going for walks, do online workouts, or take the kids outside and kick a ball around. 

For me it was art and creativity, I got myself a sketchbook and some art supplies, and I spend some time creating when my kids are asleep.

4. Set screen-free times 

We have a few screen-free times that are non-negotiable. No screens before 8am - everyone needs their sleep, and we had found that children were waking up too early in order to watch a screen. Aargh!!!!! They need to be dressed, bags packed, teeth brushed, hair brushed, and shoes on before they can have a screen.  We are also screen-free from dinner time until bedtime, we fill this time with games.

Here are some of our favourite games: 

• Uno Junior
• Keepy Uppy
• Capture the Flag
• Board games; Candyland, Crazy Chefs, Twister
• Charades
• Memory 

I really enjoy the screen-free time between dinner and bed, it's a nice time to connect with our children after the day. If the younger ones are scratchy I will start bath time early and they'll have a 30 minute bath. 

We also agreed that we would not go on screens when we were travelling in the car. Personally, I find this part hard because when my husband was driving, I would use the time to catch up on my messages!

5. Monitor screen time 

This is the boring bit, but as they say, 'you manage what you measure'. I use the screen time function on my phone to monitor how much screen time my daughter and I are having. I also try to limit her to just the one device, so it's easier to keep track of screen time. It's difficult to keep tabs if she uses my phone, then my husband's phone, then the TV.

6. Spend time connecting with your children

Cutting back on screens is a big and difficult transition for children, especially if they had unrestricted screen access before. It's good to spend time connecting with them, doing things that they like to do, listen to them and really try to build your relationship. It's amazing how much connection the screens take away. 

7. Fill the time with something else- play!!

If your children are used to sitting back and being entertained by a screen, they may have lost the inclination to play. Don't worry, you can get it back. When I talk about play, I don't mean activities. I remember crying during the lockdown, I'd spent 20 minutes setting up an activity for my kids, they spent 20 minutes on the activity, then it took me 30 minutes to clean up. The frustration was REAL! The fastest way to burn a parent out is to get them setting up, supervising, and cleaning up after the sort of kids' activities that you find online.  

Play should be free, without an intended result, and without a lot of supervision.

These are some of my favourite free play activities: 

• Magnet tiles / Connetix/ Magna Tiles etc
• Lego / Duplo
• Train set
• Monkey bars 
• Kicking a ball around
• Dolls
  

Play is also fun outdoors!

• Go to the beach/ river/ lake, any body of water near you and play  
  
• Play in the garden 
  
• Sports 
  
• Playground 
  
• Trampoline / playhouse/ monkey bars 
• Chalk on the concrete outside 
  
  

8. Reflect and reassess 

Sometimes we'll have a difficult day, someone will have a meltdown, there was fighting, or hurt feelings. It's helpful to think back over the day, was there too much screen time? Not enough sleep? Not enough quality connected time? Or something else. Often too much screen time goes hand in hand with not enough connected time. It's helpful to look back and try to figure out if there is something that you'll do differently tomorrow.

9. Don't use screen time as a punishment or a reward 

I don't know where I got this idea, but it probably goes along with my other parenting beliefs. I try not to glamorise screen time, our children don't get extra screen time if they're good, and it isn't taken away if they're naughty. I don't want them to develop a scarcity mindset, and I don't want to use screen time as a reward and reinforce the idea that screens are the best thing ever. 

I'm not an expert though, you do you. 

10. Go easy on yourself 

I'm aware reading through this that I sound very regimented, so I've added this last one in. I probably sound like I have things more together than I actually do. Cutting back on screen time for children is really hard! I first wrote this blog post in 2021 and I'm editing it now in 2025 and we have slipped up, let screens come into our lives again, then pulled things back and got back on track three or four times since then. The last time was just last week!

Apps that children use are designed to be addictive to keep children on there for longer. Sometimes it feels like it's you up against all of Silicon Valley! Don't be too hard on yourself if it's hard or you feel like you're not succeeding.  

These are some of the things that work for us, every day is still a challenge though. It is hard. Sometimes someone is sick and they end up on screens more, or we get busy and don't monitor as carefully. We're not perfect and I don't want to pretend we are. Go easy on yourself and know that this is a very difficult thing that you're doing.  

I hope you found these ideas helpful. I know cutting back on screens is difficult, stressful, and hard. It is an ongoing process and I suspect we will continue working at it for years. The screens have a way of creeping back in! Good luck. 

Some other resources we love

• As part of our commitment to cutting back on screentime I took Rachel McFedries' Smart Approach Course, which I wholeheartedly recommend.